Simon Caney Column: Only the sponsors can rescue football from FIFA

This column appears in the current edition of Sport magazine. , and

The film United Passions is, by all accounts, execrable.

In case you’ve not seen it, it’s the $20m blockbuster charting the history of FIFA. The fact that FIFA contributed $17m (the same as its entire budget for the Goal programme to fund grassroots football in poorer nations) gives you an idea of how it has treated its subject.

It’s no surprise that FIFA’s executives like to pat themselves on the back. I think those in the corridors of power genuinely believe they are making the world a better place, and would be hurt if you pointed out to them they may just be a bunch of self-serving shysters with only money on their mind.

That would be to overlook a comical series of events in the past week. FIFA’s own investigation of corruption at, er, FIFA, used up every drop of whitewash from the paint shops of Zurich. They’re going to look into that, though, and do a better job. Indeed, Sepp Blatter himself has just donned a deerstalker and picked up a big magnifying glass. That man will leave no stone unturned.

But if the unthinkable happens and Sepp finds FIFA is squeaky clean, what to do? There is talk of a boycott, but I would eat my own hat - and Sepp’s - if that came to pass. It’s a worthy idea, but one suspects that other nations are in the same boat as England and cannot jeopardise the revenue that comes from playing in FIFA events. Likewise, it’s impossible to see broadcasters refusing to bid for the rights to a World Cup.

There is but one chance: the sponsors. Emirates have walked away (replaced, brilliantly, by Qatar Airways) and so might Samsung - but it’s up to Sony or Coca-Cola to do the same. Only then, when the big bucks have gone, might the diamond-encrusted palace of FIFA come crashing down. It would make a decent sequel to the film, at any rate.